Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Weigh in ... or NOT !

So this was my first week on the P90X diet and I'm sure some of you are interested to know what the scale read. Alas, this cannot be, for I was a weak soldier in the weightloss war this week.  My week started great, I was writing down everything I ate, tracking my calories and portions of protein, carbs, veggies, ect. Wednessday I treated myself to a little frozen yogurt, very little, and I had a dairy portion to use so it was all good. Then came Thursday... and again, I did well for most of the day. Then the evening came, and so did the rationalizing. I wanted frozen yogurt again, but I had not bought any for my poor carb filled freezer, so sad." Well", thought my well rounded, perfectly will powered mind, " ice cream is EXACTLY like frozen yogurt! Smiles!!" - yes, my brain thought the smiles- wicked brain. I crossed off a dairy and a fat and ate exactly a 1/2 cup (right out of the measuring cup to be sure), and wrote down the 120 calories that were contained fortwith ( ya, I don't knbow if that is a word, or if it's spelled that way, or if it would even be used that way, it just sounded cool). Anyway, at this point I figured I was still good and when I woke up on Friday I was down 2 lbs, woo hoo, so excited. That is when I got a little too sure of myself (I blame it on my brain, remember it had all ready convinced me that yogurt and ice cream were the same thing), and gleefully reminded myself that it was my anniversary. I proceeded to persuade myself that I had been doing so good on my diet and exercise that I could eat whatever I wanted for the rest of the weekend. I know what your thinking, " Sherri, that is a pretty big leap, yogurt, to ice cream, to WHATEVER YOU WANT!" Well what can I say? Why couldn't you have spoken up before? Why couldn't I have one of your rational brains instead of this one that has continually tempted me until I had doubled my wedding weight + 20 something pounds?
Without dragging this out any longer, those of you who have followed me for a while, you know that I can gain abnormally large amounts of weight in a very minimal amount of time. Weigh in at 177lbs, ya, I know, stupid brain. Unfortunately I"ve grown attatched... crooked smiles. Yesterday I started again and did well till after dinner, then my friend who I've told you of before, "left over Father's Day cake" called my name and I ran to it. I knew that this was the wrong choice, I'm not that dilusional, and I and ate a piece as quitely and as quickly as I could, hoping beyond all hope that one of my precious children wouldn't find me and ask me "You're not on your diet right now?"  I hate that question!!! 
I thought long and hard about not posting this week because I'm not real proud of this side myself, but you know what, This is me... This is real!! This is Not an easy journey, but it is a journey I'm going to finish! I've decided, that for a while, I'll have to start posting everything I'm eating again since my own "good sence" hasn't been kicking in. Next week  hopefully, I can post exactly how this new diet is working for me. Thanks for listening... have a great day!

4 comments:

  1. We are all human, and we can't live a life full of nothing but discipline... what kind of life is that? I'm just proud of you for recognizing it, putting a limit to it, and starting over. It's okay to slip up, or even intentionally indulge sometimes, as long is you don't let it go on for months and months (sadly, my current problem.) Love you.

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  2. I think it's good for all of us to see each other's "real" sides. It makes us feel a bit more normal. I appreciate these sorts of posts because it helps me understand the people I want to work with (my goal, eventually, is to finally finish my degree and be a personal trainer). Keep going, girl! You can do it!

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  3. WOW- I am so impressed. Look how far you've come! (i've been a stalker and went through all your posts haha)

    After I had Bostyn I couldnt get rid of the last ten pounds, now that I've had Kanon I can't get rid of the last twenty. (sigh) I just can't find the motivation to actually get rid of it. I started the P90x also and made it to day three. Seriously. Hopefully I can get some motivation out of your blog. (fingers crossed)

    I cannot believe how grown up and beautiful your two oldest girls are. I remember visiting your house years and years ago with my parents and they were tiny. Its so crazy to me to see all those pics of them on facebook. They are SO beautiful (they get it from their mamma) they both look SO much like you.

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  4. Thanks for all the encouraging words! I would have a much harder time keeping this diet and exercise thing up if I didn't have you guys keeping tabs on me.

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